1. |
I trust in your faith
05:18
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I trust in your faith
before reality comes claiming
dividends of our betrayal;
each of us in self-defense
must stop this love from failing.
Fire's burning on the lower floor,
we ignore the fear like twice before
as we are dancing dances we adore
as we can't get enough and still need more.
I can smell your breathing through the steam,
it's lowering your breath rate as you lower my esteem.
The need to find each other in the storm of hot debris
binds us both together in this deadly fever dream.
I trust in your faith
before reality comes claiming
dividends of our betrayal;
each of us in self-defense
must stop this love from failing.
First time it was hope in vain,
one strong enough to end a war,
that when I glue you to my pain,
that it could fix the scars.
That time we did not know
this could not work in any way;
because what we command to go
is what will always stay.
I trust in your faith
before reality comes claiming
dividends of our betrayal;
each of us in self-defense
must stop this love from failing.
Second time we waged the war
our spirits had provoked;
loving went behind the bars
as the human mirrors broke.
Tried to recreate the dream
by factoring its matter;
let everything go up in steam
instead of getting better.
I trust in your faith
before reality comes claiming
dividends of our betrayal;
each of us in self-defense
must stop this love from failing.
We are burning, our bodies
urge the souls to turn
inside to see our spirits dying
from this deadly joke.
Arm in arm, we fall to bed
to be one in our pain.
Warming our hearts
by going up in lethal flames.
I trust in your faith
before reality comes claiming
dividends of our betrayal;
each of us in self-defense
must stop this love from failing.
So admired in confusion
is a love without conclusion
So admired in confusion
is a love as a conclusion
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2. |
Not yours (instrumental)
01:17
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3. |
Sini
03:52
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This crazy magic makes me go insane
I give it every day another name
Spirit, faith, the holy god,
it gives me everything and I give what I´ve got.
This glorious belief in higher goals
makes me compatible with hideous thoughts,
provides relief for all the wistful foals,
that any mother sold her man for gold.
Father, holy spirit,
be my guest, I'll be your host.
Find reason to believe in me,
I'm gathering the ghosts .
Willfully I lay my whole life in your better hands,
you give me a goal and take away the bitterness.
Proudly I will find you in the things I can't explain,
nobody can urge me to unthink you will sustain.
Nature, mother Mary, you´re so mean,
no one gives a shoulder when I´m here and need to lean.
(All my fellow men adore my sister like a queen,
don't they know she's pure and holy like an empty screen?)
I'm an artist and a player and I choose my friends,
I spread my narcissistic flair because I understand
the lonely man who slays his rival for a one night stand;
God, forgive my broken soul, I lay it in your hands.
(my soul will be forgiven in the No-Mans-Land)
Every thought and deed does serve a purpose in the plan,
indeed is sought after in ev'ry place a man can scan,
the loss of loves of our lives has reason well defined
by forces we will always search, but not achieve to find.
(Women of this world, I love your bodies so,
we are made to fit together and to grow,
we make this world for our children just the place we know
is unlike everything that anybody has to show.)
Please persist forever, watch thy children from above,
let me speak what I believe to them on your behalf.
Get me everywhere I want to be when I'm in pain,
I dont want to live when natures law is my restraint.
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4. |
Skin-deep apoplogy
04:01
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Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, it´s your fault,
I thought that I was safe, I thought that I was safe, sorry, sorry, I love you,
Your fault that I´m losing all my dreams to you, your fault that I
never had a dream until you came. You saved my soul and now I can´t
allow you to go away.
Oh, I love, I love, I love, believe, I love,
believe me I can love because to prove it is too tough and that my world is now so rough is all
your fault. It´s your fault that I fell
in love, for your´s I give you hell as your reward,
it´s my honesty, my intimacy, your fault.
Sorry that I bore you, sorry to adore you, sorry I´m not born the way you´d want me more, your fault
that you´re better than I ever could deserve, your fault,
so you´ve got to stay and serve my nerves...
I´m sorry that I love you, I´m sorry that I love you,
I´m sorry I do nothing nice but idolize
the things you gave despite my vice
against your reasons best advice to me.
You wanted to be good,
were obliged to prove their lies,
as they told you I was too weak not to merit
All the strength you have to live on
I could take but not inherit
day by day you lose your guilt,
until we´re even and I leave haply into nights.
Weren´t you proud to be my savior?
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5. |
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6. |
Not lonely
06:16
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So often the people did leave,
you made it hard for them to come.
Now you try so hard to believe
into the look-a-loving thing you´ve become.
No, you ain´t lonely,
it just pleases you to
cease recieving humble and
too tedious bids.
Well, your feelings are made for thieves,
but for the good ones and not for everyone.
The ones who´ll steal from you a loving kiss,
before you realize the thing they have done.
No, you ain´t lonely,
you just use to kill your
time by teasing all your
feelings you can never please
And never you would have come to think
that it´s just you who has to learn their way
out of the hole of sorrow in which they sink
and wait for gods hand bringing them night and day.
How many lone nights did you sit and pray
to make anything that you did undone.
but did you ever understand when they said
that just belief is not to be someone.
No, you ain´t lonely,
you´re just feeling cold
because you froze your heart
to keep it cool
No, you ain´t lonely,
you´re just freezing
because you lost your reason.
I don´t know why
All the wise men have come to the ends
of all the strings they ever could understand.
But you´re still keeping the gun to defend
the trace of nothing that is left in your hand.
No, you ain´t lonely, girl,
the only things that keep you
all alone is all the traits
you use to separate from all … the people
(that need to admire you)
No, you aren´t lovely,
you are cruel
when you are fooling
all the other hypocrits.
No, you aren't lovely,
you are lonely
and despite your beauty
you will only drain your friends
while lying in their hands.
... and crying, feeling most alone
in company while trying to deny
your wish to die.
... because you get no force to live
... from the living stiff
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7. |
Working on this joke
03:44
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I´ve been working on this joke
for years, but everyone breaks out in tears
when they hear what I've to say.
There was this girl at the shopping mall,
I stood next to her so tall,
when she cast a smile on me.
I could say: How´s the shopping going?
She´d say: You´re not half as funny as you think.
And we would laugh.
I never said a word.
I´ve been working on this joke
for years, oh, when it comes to people
I´m a tool.
I was young and with friends
I walked around the blocks
displacing future and past tense.
And they wore misty, bitter faces
said: We make this world a better place.
Made me honestly laugh, well,
sometimes it is just too much -
they poked the fun right out of me.
I´ve been working on this joke
for years of a man who wants
to see the world in peace.
It´s yours to seize.
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8. |
Teknody (instrumental)
04:24
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9. |
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Once I was one
and you weren't real.
I had nothing to give,
there was nothing to steal.
And my world was of pain
and the first time I screamed;
then you took it away
and told me to lean.
And by holding you tight,
by the caress agreed
upon, evil would seize;
made your loving be
a part of me.
You came and you claimed
you're my friend, it is true,
and all joy that exists
is created through you.
You gave me your comfort,
a home and a chance
to earn all of the love
that you gave in advance.
Thus my life had a path
clear of strife and all wrath
and your vision and plea
was reality
as a part of me.
Thus our bond was the basement
for all that I've built
and your guidance and aid was the soil for my skill
and I prospered through foster and warmth of your quilt;
well too late I realized you penalized all that dared to rise from the domain of my will
while you patronized to make me memorize the things you didn't like would hurt your soul, make you ill;
all my structures are ruptured by sanction and guilt.
And the longer I'm wake and the longer I seek
I know that I know nothing and it makes me so weak
and I try to find out, cast aside the bad seed
but my heart and my thoughts are infected too deep;
I tear out healthy tissue as well to proceed
and I hear myself cry as I feel something bleed;
something I have forgotten, from which I did flee,
that will always recur, never cease willingly
It's me.
You had told no demands,
so to let you quite near;
now you rule my whole world
with a promise and fear.
And you give the gross beauty
one finds everywhere
to me 'cause I am special
and you've got some to spare.
And thus make it my duty
to separate and share
all I cherish and see
with what you want to be:
A part of me.
Now I realize life
without you starts with pain,
but it's mine and I thrive
and work hard to remain.
I'm aware that my feelings
stand bare without guard;
but when my reason and heart start to disagree,
then to be free I need to separate from
a part of me.
I remember our past when I look in your face,
past the wistful remorse in your eyes, past the haze,
I can see that you know and have known from the start,
that I will not make you what you can not be.
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10. |
Nobody's fault but mine
07:42
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Tell my why you love me, mother,
tell me why we need each other,
why coerce me with a gift
of life that's not allowed to drift away?
I speak with wisdom of a heart that's born to serve,
I speak with horror of an entity existing to preserve
a vanity of homesick parrots looking out to gain
emotions from an aging memory with blind spots on its pain.
Mother, you accuse me of not caring about you;
what can I say besides I'm happy even though a claim is true?
I don't propose to make it up
to you or be a better child;
do what you want to do and let me live my distinct life.
I don't accept a family that argues with a sigh
to make me feel unwell when I don't really feel like to comply.
I am alone, thus, by my choice and don't need handkerchiefs to dry
or any of your pity, it's nobody's fault but mine.
I guess this was the last talk that the two of us will share,
today you finally had the courage to confront that I'm a boor,
that I don't say the things you'd like to hear
far more than what I care.
It started when I didn't let you have a piece of cake;
that is the kind of thing, you said, a truly good friend is to make;
I can well see you are bewitched by my ability to bake,
but I will only let you love me for the things you cannot take.
I do nothing to deserve your very friendship and your tie,
I want my love all for myself so I can't utter it is thy
because a free man does disprize any confession of a lie.
Do keep your sympathy, it's no ones fault but mine.
Say, what was the meaning of your empty looking gaze,
you might not tell me anymore, I know, 'cause I don't heed your blazes,
I acknowledge only strength, I'm not your friend to bear your laze,
I'll hold your hand as long as I see all this worlds joy in your face.
Pal, don't claim to know about a tragedy you see,
it's only borne by your own fantasy and not in me.
I see that to enjoy your sorrow, you must now leave me behind.
There's truly no need to be sorry, it's nobody's fault but mine.
Your blond hair glared as sunburst and your eyes were blue as vice,
you showed your teeth and corny wisdom,
so you promised paradise.
And under watchful clouds I said with pride and poetry of stars:
There is much truth on earth I can't escape and don't dare to deny.
I want to sleep with you.
And grinningly you turned to go and left me without scars.
I am alone as consequence of being such a kind,
but I am one at least and only
live to satisfy my mind.
And surely I don't need your pity,
it's nobody's fault but mine.
Don't waste time feeling sorry, it's nobody's fault but mine.
As summit of my life
I pick to climb a mountain high
to break the bound’ries of the sky;
on my way down, though, sense so nigh
a dread that I prepare to die
as god in heaven hears my cry.
Son, what futile venture for a single man to try;
this is my holy rock on earth above where any man should hike.
I am the god and I am merciful, so bow and don't defy me,
I will grant you dewy force and lay relief on your spent thighs.
I only want you to accommodate to laws I have compiled,
so you will disappoint me not once more and break my heart affined.
(Son, what futile venture for a single man to try;
this is my holy rock on earth above where any man should hike.
Knee down in humbleness and ask me to grant mercy to your life
and I will contemplate before the sacred judgment is applied.)
“Well, dearest dad, it’s my decision and it’s none you have to like.
I disregard your holy spectacle in view of horrid plight;
go put your nose into your own mud high above where surely
I don’t need your pity, it’s nobody’s fault but mine.”
And if you think my way awry and my kin dangerously fey,
then that's the one thing that you can not ever take from me away.
My way through natures jungle is not your turn to define;
even if wilderness will kill me, it's nobody's fault but mine.
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11. |
Narcissistic eagle
03:36
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I rose without parents,
I rose without praise,
I rose into sky
with prodigious pace
just to fall down in the wind,
and feel it fleeting on my wings,
wondering what is left to win,
as the sky's turning black and grim.
I hunt with the storm,
I am one with the thunder,
I see ev'ry worm
gaze at me from below
and I'm filling the eyes of the beasts with tears
and I'm cold like the ice and their vice and fears
and I'm making the earthbound stop awestruck in wonder
and this land is my place, but I strive over yonder.
I sway in the wind and I hunt my prey
and majestically I draw attention away from others;
I feel good when I'm admired
but all I see in their faces is bland and dire.
There's no one in this place like me.
I'm an eagle with it's wings on fire
and I'm fierce and I burn with a tense desire
to see my home and know some kind of family.
I see a couple of wild mice crossing
the field to escape their groups, get lost
and enjoy some time of privacy.
Now they are my prey and I make my way
to their place and their gazes freeze in panic.
And the male runs away and the lost mouse stays
I come down in front and it dares to stare in my face.
I'm confused and afraid of this trust of my bait.
And I feel betrayed about a love never made
for me, the king of the air.
And it turns around and I tear it down
and I pick dead meat from its bloody bones to live.
And the wonder in its eyes so bleak
with its wish to thrive and to feel and to flee
connects me with each enemy of mine.
I'm an eagle with its wings on fire
and I'm fierce and I burn with a tense desire
to see my home and know some kind of family.
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